Carl (bokonon) wrote,

  • Mood:
  • Music:

day to day

after reading Calvins post, I have to say you're pretty strong for being able to cope with all of what's going on.

i rememeber in sebastopol when my mother was diagnosed with breast cancer. i couldnt really beleive it was happening. but she went to the hospital and had a portion of her breast removed. she was recovering fine, but they found more cancer. they had to go and remove the whole breast in another surgery. it was one of the hardest things i've ever had to deal with, even tho i didnt do very much to deal with it at the time other than smoke lots of weed and not give a shit about anything.

the recovery was pretty difficult. another doctor, a very nice man who was very good with her, helped her rebuild her breast. she was very greatful for what he did, then someone came into his office and shot him dead. it was near shattering again for my mother as she was just starting to get her life back. no one really knows who did it or why they did. but i guess people put alot of trust in you if you're a reconstructive plastic surgeon.

but i ask myself, where i was for all of this. i still really regret not being more supportive of her and putting her through everything i did while i lived there. she didnt place any restrictions on me at all, so i ran free. very very free. i've told her i'm sorry for not being there and for making her deal with so much extra bullshit because of me. but she says it's all ok, and that it was a hard time for all of us, with our family having just seperated. i think she understood what what happening and just let things flow. i know how much she cares about me and i know that must have been hard for her to do. it's just very surreal to think back on it all now.

and to calvin i say you have a wonderful opprotunity, to be able to understand what your mother is going through and help her out. you're a good friend to all of us, and i know you'll follow your heart.
  • Post a new comment


    default userpic
    When you submit the form an invisible reCAPTCHA check will be performed.
    You must follow the Privacy Policy and Google Terms of use.